Living in Community

I don’t know if I can fully capture in words the myriad of thoughts and emotions that are streaming through my head right now. If I was forced to choose just one word to coral my thought process, I guess it would have to be gratitude. About four months ago, Lindsay and I were going through a period in our lives in which we felt very lonely. We had the comforts of each other but we did not feel that we were a part of any community that met together on a consistent basis. We had our church and our jobs. I had my friends that I somewhat kept in touch with and Lindsay had her friends, but we didn’t have any couples that we shared as mutual friends. This is a weird phenomenon that one can’t fully appreciate until one actually experiences the cold shoulder of loneliness.

To make a long story short, Lindsay and I decided to invite 2 couples over to our house that we somewhat knew to discuss the possibility of starting a small group. If I can be completely transparent, I was very nervous about the implications of starting a small group. I have been a part of several great small groups that I still treasure to this day but I had never been in a small group with my wife. I’m not really sure what I was afraid of but I think my main fear resided in wondering if Lindsay and I were the only couple who were feeling like they were on the outside of community looking in. But then God showed up. In all my anxiety of having to face our vulnerability of desperately needing community, I hadn’t really anticipated how God might answer our prayer.

Somewhere in between fresh bread, Country Captain Chicken and three cups of coffee, Lindsay and I threw all caution to the wind and just opened our hearts to our dinner guests. I’m not really sure why I opened up as much as I did, but I felt compelled to bare my soul and our need for friends. I then waited for the rebuke of our companions…but it never came. Instead of criticism, judgment or even advice, Lindsay and I were met with open arms by the Searby’s and the McKnights. They then began to open up their hearts to us and share some of the feelings that they were encountering. In hearing their confessions and dreams about their own vulnerability and life dreams, a great sense of connectedness overcame me. Lindsay and I were not alone. There were other people that were praying about the same kind of relationships that we were praying for. After several hours of talking, laughing and sharing Jennifer Searby looked over at her husband Joel and said with a smile, “We have friends.”

We have friends. I have thought about that statement many times since it first fell across my ears. I even stayed up until 3:00 a.m. in the morning thinking about our group (I’m sure the 3 cups of coffee had a hand in my insomnia as well) but I couldn’t contain my excitement for this new community of believers. We have friends. As I sit here typing this entry after another wonderful gathering, gratitude consumes my thoughts once again. Thank you God for continually bringing people into my life that show me love. I long for the day in which we all will gather around your throne and celebrate you.